Day 2: Water, Dance, and Support
Today I moved.
I use to love to dance. Fully self expressed movement. Uninhibited. And then I stopped.
And then I reached a point where I needed several drinks to move with the same freedom.
“I got my drink and my two step”
I could say I don’t know what happened, but I do.
I remember the moment when my love and brightness for dancing dimmed. I remembered what he said as I danced proudly in my mom’s living room.
I instantly gave all sorts of meaning and power to his words, to his laughter at my confident movement.
I let myself be smaller.
I questioned my movement in public moving forward. I still question my ability….not consciously but I do. So I feel the music and I timidly two step now.
I lower inhibitions with alcohol and then I fear drinks because… genetics, and that maybe I inherited my dad’s disease.
Today I danced. I celebrated black queer love and I got to watch my friend get married and I danced at her wedding. It felt freeing and I danced through my inhibitions, though they were still so heavily there.
35 to 35.
Other things to know.
Hydration. I have a Big A$$ water bottle. 67oz. Because I need to drink a lot of water. And for me Having to drink 3 of these feels better than having to drink more of a smaller water bottle.
One thing I haven’t always been in the practice of is asking for help.
How can you support me during my 35 to 35?
There are many things you can do if you want to support my 35 to 35. Invite me out, over, or to share in some activity with you. Schedule a workout time with me. Schedule a meal with me.Send me a meal. Sponsor something healing. Wanna give me a massage, some reiki, pedicure? Send me all the words of encouragement and motivation. Help me clean my home. Tell me all your hydration tricks. Make me a play list. Come with me to the doctor. Donate toward me taking a vacation. Let’s have a conversation over some tea. Send me pictures of cute babies and animals. Remind me to breath. Send me your favorite meditations and yoga moves. What are your tips to practicing self care? Let’s play board games. Send me puns.
What way would you like to support? Check in with me around what I need. Help me practice naming what I might need. It’s challenging.
I love all support virtually, via the phone, and in person.